Five Before Chaos

Yep, by now you’ve heard of the latest incoherent word spray that was Sara Palin’s resignation speech. Between losing her and Joe the Plumber, I’m becoming blog-despondent. Actually, not really, beacuse like herpes, these two just keep coming back and giving more, whether you want them to, or not. Can’t wait for Caribou Barbie’s big scandal to break.. you just know it will.

Anyways for your perusal, Ed Brayton had to quote one of Sullivan’s readers with something so good and spot-on, I’m just going to be lazy and quote it here, too (but by all means, please go visit Ed’s Most Excellent Dispatches From the Culture Wars, one of my few regular reads). This basically captures the fundamentalist psychology for reality-suspension in a nutshell, at least as to how it relates to why they love Palin:

Part of Sarah Palin’s irresistible appeal to her fundamentalist base is her ability to look at the camera with utter conviction and declare black to be white.

The ability to lie well is a valuable part of the fundamentalist psychology. My son isn’t gay, he just hasn’t found the right woman! Those rocks aren’t 50 million years old, they just look like it as a test of our faith! My sexless marriage isn’t foundering, it is filled with God’s spirit! The minister isn’t molesting little Maria, they’re just very close! It isn’t torture, it is being tough on terrorists!

Fundamentalists can recognize a truly audacious and talented liar from miles away. Instead of running the other way, as you might expect, they gather around the powerful liar, for they know that their own lies will be respected and protected by a leader who understands the paramount importance of preserving their whole system of denial.

Ouch! Make it stop, the stoopid makes my teeth hurt!

BTW, did you know Barack Mohhama Obama wants to be sworn in on the Koran? (h/t to Pharyngula)

And so the godidiocy continues from Mike Huckabee. Now it’s how we “need to amend the Cosntitution to meet God’s standards.” From Pensito Review:

Huckabee:

“[Some of my opponents] do not want to change the Constitution, but I believe it’s a lot easier to change the Constitution than it would be to change the word of the living God, and that’s what we need to do is to amend the Constitution so it’s in God’s standards rather than try to change God’s standards,” Huckabee said, referring to the need for a constitutional human life amendment and an amendment defining marriage as between a man and a woman.

So basically, we’re talking about a Christian form of sharia (the Islamic law that theocratic Muslim states have).This stuff will undoubtedly win him some votes in Kansas and Oklahoma, to be sure. But it has about as much of a chance of happening a he does getting elected. And in Huckabee’s America, will he be consistent with Biblical law, or just the convenient ones, as these evangelical whackjobs usually are?:

In fact, while being gay is an abomination-class sin — along with eating shellfish, leftovers and snakes, reading a horoscope, burning incense, women wearing pants, arrogance, improperly covering your poop in the desert, to name a few — there are only Ten Commandments, and if you believe any of it, you have believe that being an adulterer is as immoral, and thus should be as illegal, as being gay, if not moreso.

I don’t poop in the desert… that’s not to say I won’t some day, but I have pooped in the forest. What does the Bible say about that? Am I off the hook? If this guy weren’t so serious, it’d be funny. Problem is there’s a number of people who believe the same horseshit. The Right’s Field has also picked up on this, but it focuses on Huck’s push-poll efforts as of late.

I know, some people on our side genuinely worry that Huck’s populist rhetoric and aw-shucks non-threatening demeanor can somehow get him to the White House. I beg to differ. There is so much well-documented dirt on this guy, godidiot related and otherwise, that I don’ think he’ll make it out of the primaries, let alone win the general. I really think this guy is the last gasp of the religious right.